Showing posts with label emergency. Show all posts
Showing posts with label emergency. Show all posts

Monday, September 19, 2011

The Importance of a Plan

Over the last couple of days I've been obsessively scouring information about "Bug-Out Bags" and 72 hour survival kits. When it comes to the end of the world, I'm realistic. It's going to happen. Or at least a detrimental earthquake that puts life on hold for a few days. What would you do if such an event occurred? Aside from the pants-wetting and boot-shaking, you would find yourself unprepared, with nothing to eat, your water possibly unsafe to drink and as looters run rampant you would discover yourself unprotected and a victim to the new world laws.

The best way in these probable events is to be prepared. The main things you need to think of, are: food and water, shelter and sleeping, clothes, tools, first aid, hygiene, money and security and last of all, protection.

While pre-made and custom kits can be found online, DIY lists can also be found in order for you assemble your own Bug-Out Bag.

With this, I suggest including laminated copies of directions to a "safehouse" or meet-up for you and your family, as well as plans in case of different apocalyptic events.

The other matter which has been pressing upon me is the fact that in the event of an emergency, your conscience will have to take a backseat. Or be left behind. People are known to do scrupulous things in a state of panic or without the law holding their hands. Therefore it's best to realize that people should be avoided and while you might want to help everyone, they could be playing possum to take advantage of your better nature.

If you feel that you can live with the possibility of having to leave people behind, hurt others to protect yourself and live in seclusion then you may be prepared for world-ending events!

Monday, July 25, 2011

911 Animal Complaints

Scenario 1: You see four adorable and cuddly raccoon babes handing out in a tree, apparently motherless. You think - they can't get down and you believe a police-run rescue mission is in order. You call 911 because supposedly this a bloody emergency. Me, the dispatcher, can tell you how this goes:

Me: Which service, police, fire, ambulance?

You: Police

Me: What's your emergency?

You: There are four raccoon babies stuck in a tree.

Me: Okay so you want an officer to shoot them down?

You: NO! I want an officer to rescue them.

Me: Okay well if an officer goes, they're going to be shot out of the tree. Trust me though, they'll make it down.

You: Umm never mind... *click*

Scenario 2: You're bit once by the neighbour's frothing mutt Miss Tickles. You freak out, imagining horrendous scenes from Cujo, even though you're safe and sound in your home. You call 911. If I answer, this is how it's going to go:

Me: Which service, police, fire, ambulance?

You: Police.

Me: What's your emergency?

You: My neighbour's dog bit me 10 minutes ago.

Me: Did you bite it back? No? Well the police aren't paid enough to come bite a dog and teach it a lesson for your wussy ass. Have a nice day.

Scenario 3: This is a regular one, and keep in mind I have to take notes when I answer a call. It goes like this:

Me: Which service, police, fire, ambulance?

You: Police.

Me: What's your emergency?

You: There's a coyote walking down the road.

Me: And it's just walking.

You: Yeah.

Me: Is it getting into garbage, or acting aggressive?

You: No.

Me: So it's just walking down the road?

You: Yes.

Me: Okay I'll send an officer out right away.

You: Thank you! *hangs up*

Officer: What was that about?

Me: Nothing, just more paper to shred.